Urns and Burials
Having to plan the burial or cremation of your child goes against nature and all that we know. This was not supposed to happen, but it has. The shock of having to do this is unreal. However, it is a must. So, here are some things I have found helpful in my trips to the funeral home.
To cremate or to bury???
This is a horrible question. I wish no parent had to decide. It is a VERY personal question. As bereaved parents you do what you feel best suits you and your angel. We personally choose cremation. My husband could not bear to see an infant casket and neither could I. Plus, I love "having" my babies here with me. I can kiss their urn anytime I feel like it.
Cremation
Call around! Many, many funeral homes will cremate infants for free or for a nominal charge.
Urns
This Etsy shop has offered 20% off your order if you mention Triplet Butterfly Wings. You MUST email her first for her to make you a special listing to get the discount. These wooden boxes are perfect! Thanks Carrie!
Other options ~ you can place their ashes which should come in a sealed clear bag of some sort in a old jewelry box or family heirloom. We at first placed Colin and Courtney in my husband's late mother's small ceramic jewelry box. However, when Jaxon passed they all would not fit. We opted with buying a new larger silver/pewter jewelry box and got their names engraved on top. I still can open it, which I love. I also liked this option better because it doesn't look like an urn. We like that only we know what special cargo that box is holding.
I find myself trying to do everything in my power to keep their memory alive. I want them everywhere with me. I have collected several ideas on how you can help keep your angel(s) memory alive.
Engraved Jewelry
After my Colin and Courtney passed away, I received the most perfect necklace in the mail from a complete stranger. It was a simple little necklace that had three charms that had little feet on the front and their names engraved on the back. I have only taken it off once since then because I had to. I often find myself holding onto it and rubbing them. I love them so very much.
I also received the most perfect ring from my brother and sister-in-law. It is three bands intertwined that has each of my babies names on one. They were together from the start and are now together again. It is absolutely perfect.
Another beautiful jewelry site with great prices. If you mention Triplet Butterfly Wings while ordering, you will receive a 10% discount on your order. Thanks Tina!
Butterfly Garden
The butterfly is symbolic of rebirth after death. I feel so peaceful when I work in my garden. We have a butterfly mural on our back yard wall with my angels' names. I feel I am more with them when I am making "their place" beautiful.
Stepping Stones
Painting stepping stones is a affordable way to help keep their memory alive. We have several around our garden and yards. It is especially a great way for children to partipate in the memory of their sibling(s). Make sure to get the paint made especially for outside. It can be found at your local craft store.
Tattoos
I got my first and only tattoo for my angels and couldn't be happier that I did. I love having a part of them on me forever. I have their footprints on my heart...constantly and literally.
Butterfly Release
Although more costly, this a very beautiful way to remember your angels. There are many sites on the web that can help you with this. The majority of them are very sensitive to your needs and short notice of needing the butterflies.They regularly sell to bereaved families and are usually eager to help you.
www.butterflymemorials.com - If you order through this company and mention Triplet Butterfly Wings, they will give you a $10 discount off of each dozen. Thanks Jose for your generosity!
Balloon Release
We release balloons to our angels on special occassions or whenever we feel like sending them one. Although we "know" the balloons come back down, it is still comforting to see them bouncing in the air up towards our angels. We attach balloon tags to the strings so we can share our angels with others. We have received many back and I know that when these strangers came across our tags they were touched by our story. I keep all the tags I receive back. Here is an example of our tags.
Front
Our First Heavenly Birthday
Jaxon Thomas
3/2/07 - 5/29/07
Colin Alexander
3/2/07 - 3/8/07
Courtney Grace
3/2/07 - 3/8/07
Forget me not, for I am there
with the beat of your heart,
on the wings of your prayer.
Back
This balloon was released
by family and friends in
__________________________
to join these precious angels
on their first Heavenly birthday.
If found, please return to their
parents at: P.O. Box 2524,
Camarillo, CA 93011-2524
Never, ever forgotten...
forever loved.
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